How to understand that you do not like yourself
It is now incredibly popular to talk about self-love. Like, this is more important than anything in the world and without these feelings the reality will be slightly distorted, and happiness is vague and, probably, inaccessible. Everything is just like that. It is not necessary to strive for absolute happiness - this is a very controversial sensation, ephemeral and far-fetched. But striving for self-love is a must. Through self-love, you see the world around you. This is not about selfishness, but about love, respect and confidence, with which it would be good to make friends. It's a shame, of course, to realize that the problem - this or that - exists, but still let's get away from the Soviet stereotypes that to love yourself is embarrassing or no time. Times have changed a long time ago, it's time for you to change. Below are the most common signs by which you can recognize that somewhere in the depths of your soul you are still in doubt, or, even worse, do not like yourself.
You do not know how to spend time with you
Remember school years when girlfriends synchronously got up from the table and went to the restroom? Funny. But quite understandable.Age, you know, such. But at the age of thirty, you should be able to walk independently not only to the restroom, but also to the cinema, to shop for new things, to go on trips and even to celebrate the New Year in proud solitude. But often the reality is that a person has absolutely nothing to do alone with himself. In the course are available tools - TV, phone, friends. The bottom line is that the ideal company for any person (in the first place) is himself. Allow yourself to just sit in silence or catch the pleasure of simple banal things that can be done at home. Plunge into them, listen to yourself, become interesting. But what could be more exciting than talking to yourself? That is an important process, which seems to never have enough time, but in fact you just do not possess this skill.
You love to give advice to everyone but yourself.
Empathy is beautiful. A kind soul, seeking to help everyone, is good. But if you perform these actions to your own detriment, then at some point nothing will be left of you. It is necessary to be scattered by personal energy with the mind. Think for what you are helping? Is there after help true satisfaction? It's time to give advice to yourself and your life, to learn to imagine that you are the very person in need of support,whose interests you protect first.
You have a bad relationship with your parents.
You are already thirty, maybe more, but you are all wearing problems from childhood, returning to the past and cannot forgive your parents for something earlier. Believe in their unreasonable and complete lack of importance or practicality. People who gave you life, do not deserve that you spend so much time tormenting. Yes, they did something wrong, as you think. But you had plenty of time to forget or let it all go to the air. And go further.
You are often offended
The eternal child, who is touched by the words of others, is a convenient tactic, but using it you always lose. To be offended means to look for the guilty one. Do not take responsibility for yourself. There is still such a moment that those who are always offended do not perceive reality adequately, often think up problems and expect something from others. Which, by the way, often do not know what you came up with yourself. It is also important not to forget that by showing offense to another, we make him feel guilty. This leaves a very unpleasant feeling, to the point that you simply don’t want to communicate with you.
You always expect something from others
When a person does not like himself, he has such a feature as clinging to others. Well, you know, when the meeting took place, and you already think that you have made friends. This property hurts the beginning of any relationship, especially romantic. A full-fledged person, with his healthy inner world, is not inclined to grab at the life of another at every opportunity, why should he? And those who are not located to themselves, are looking for this "love" everywhere. As a lifeline or at least some confirmation of its own significance.
You often argue
Give only a reason to argue and get to the bottom of the truth - is it about you? Think about where so much aggression and desire to prove something. It seems to you that you are striving for justice, but in essence - you are throwing out negative energy. And with it the positive vitality. For help, refer more to logic and common sense than to the external, the very first emotions. You yourself will feel that in time you will become calmer and less devastated.
You want a relationship too much
A relationship, most likely not. Here it is important to understand for what reason there is a panic on the subject of having a partner.He is vital for you for what? Fill your life with all sorts of emotions? Saturate the sluggish existence of meaning? Unfortunately, the most banal idea that we get what we want only when we give it up is true. So we learn not only to love ourselves, but also to be adults and wise. A whole independent world. This is, as a result, the main internal willingness (and not the need) to meet a no less full partner.
You have weight problems
Do you like to be pampered with a piece of cake? Count how often you need this pampering. And in general, appreciate your figure. If there is excess weight, then the reason lies in the food, which chaotically and thoughtlessly enters you. What is really going on? Food - the fastest and most primitive way to bring yourself instant pleasure. Not knowing other ways to console yourself, and you fill up with dissatisfaction and internal grievances. It very quickly becomes a habit and becomes a way of life. Try to limit yourself in the wrong products that act on the body as "spam". You will have to endure three or four days, but then new habits will decorate your reality and encourage your complexion.
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